Rule No. 3 - Never talk about your ex-boyfriend on a date

As Wednesday dawned I was beginning to feel very excited about going over to Will’s. He was going to cook me dinner. Surely that was a good sign. You don’t cook dinner for someone unless you’re pretty keen on them.

On Tuesday night I spent the evening beautifying myself. I put an intensive conditioner on my hair, applied a face masque and trimmed and shaved all my hairy bits. As I was straightening my hair, I got a text message from Will.

Hey you. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow night.
From: Will
20:03 17-OCT-06

I felt a glow inside and my heart skipped a beat.

When I got to Will’s the next evening he was cooking Spaghetti Bolognese. He grabbed me and snogged me as soon as I got in the door. To my horror we sat down on the sofa and ate dinner whilst watching Wales v Russia in a world cup qualifier.

“I can’t believe we’re watching football on our first date,” I said.

“I thought you liked football,” said Will

“I do, but not that much, and it’s Wales v Russia!”

I wasn’t too impressed with the Spaghetti Bolognese either. I like to think I’m quite a good cook and a lot of peoples cooking doesn’t meet my high standards. This particular meal was pretty dire though. There was hardly any meat in it, there were big chunks of crunchy garlic and the sauce came out from a jar. I always make mine from scratch.

After dinner we watched the football and I kept dropping hints that I’d rather be doing something else.

“Well, you could always do something to distract me,” said Will suggestively.

I knew what he had in mind but I have to admit I suddenly felt really shy. Eventually though we made it onto the lounge floor, which was pretty uncomfortable and then into the bedroom.

After a session of amazing sex, we just lay there chatting.

“Has anyone ever told you you’ve got amazing tits?” said Will.

As it happened a lot of people had said something similar and I was always very flattered. Although there was always a small part of me that thought they were probably just trying to get in my knickers.

Will asked me why Cam and I had split up. I spent ages going into great detail about all of Cam’s faults and how I had wanted to get married but Cam wasn’t ready to commit. Later, as Will was gently snoring by my side I wondered whether I should have gone into so much detail. It probably didn’t make me a very attractive prospect. But then surely you should be honest with each other from the start. I had always believed that communication was the key to a successful relationship.

It was beginning to dawn on me how easy I’d had it with Cam and David. They had both been completely besotted with me from the start. I never had to worry about coming on too strong or playing hard to get. Cam and David had both been nice guys and treated me really well. They were too nice really. I decided I needed a to go out with someone with a bit more about them, with a bit more get up and go. I realised that in order to get a guy like that, I needed to start playing a bit harder to get.

I really liked Will but I wasn’t sure if he could be the one. He was very good looking, amazing in bed and really good fun but there was just something that I wasn’t quite sure about. I couldn’t put my finger on it.

I was finding it really difficult to sleep. It was very hard to relax in somebody else’s bed, especially when that somebody was very sexy and lying beside me naked. I was very conscious of tossing and turning in I case I woke Will. I also really badly needed to fart. I had to keep going into the bathroom in order to break wind. No sooner had I got back into bed than I needed to fart again.

In the end I did doze off for an hour or two. I woke up to find Will pulling me towards him for some more incredible sex. He woke me up again first thing in the morning and we had sex before we both went off to work.

I was quite impressed that Will made me breakfast. Ok, it was only tea and toast but still.

“So, when can I see you again?” I asked. As soon as the words came out of my mouth I regretted them.

“Oh I’m not sure what plans I’ve got. I’ll let you know.”

“Well, I’m free on Saturday if that’s any good.” God, what was the matter with me? I just couldn’t help myself.

I had arranged my appointments around Surrey that day, which was where Will lived. I sent him a text about 10 ‘o’ clock.

Thx for a gr8 night and gr8 sex. Hope to see you Saturday. xx
To: Will
10:02 19-OCT-06

I wasn’t sure if should have text him. Maybe I was coming on a bit strong. But I didn’t want to be rude. Surely you should say thank you after a date, I thought.